26.4.07

Bollywood's Most Wanted

Judge Dinesh Gupta issued warrants for the arrest of Hollywood actor Richard Gere and Bollywood actor Shilpa Shetty for "transgressing all limits of vulgarity" during their appearance at an HIV/AIDS event. Gere laid some smooches on Shepta, and she was berated by the judge for not resisting his "advances."

Gere effigies have been burned all over India in protest. If arrested, he could face up to three months in prison.

....huh. Yet no one has been charged with the murderous stoning of Indian widow Munnuswamy Pavanamma from Andhra Pradesh in 2003 by her own family and neighbors for the terrible crime of being HIV-positive. Police dismissed the murder as her "having died of natural complications from her illness."

I didn't realize that blunt head trauma and bleeding head wounds were common complications of HIV...?

So I guess the message is: contracting HIV/AIDS in India is pretty deadly - especially for widows. Good to see the government is taking such proactive action to help fight the spread of the disease and raise awareness by arresting Richard Gere. Who was there trying to raise awareness.

Click here to watch the "highly sexual, erotic" (and pretty silly) video.

20.4.07

The Rogue Nation of NaughtyFerrets

I'm proud of the country I've created! You can create your own country by going to www.nationstates.net. For those of you who've read Jennifer Government (if you haven't, I recommend it! It's witty, well-written, thought provoking, and has a really neat cover), Max Barry is the inspiration behind this site. There's really no point to Nation States, I just like to see my country's bio change every day after I address any issues. Here's today's:

The Rogue Nation of NaughtyFerrets
"What would a ferret dookadookadooka?"


"The Rogue Nation of NaughtyFerrets is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its punitive income tax rates. Its hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 300 million are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defence, and the Environment. The average income tax rate is 55%, and even higher for the wealthy. A substantial private sector is dominated by the Trout Farming industry.

Main battle tanks stalk the woods of NaughtyFerrets in search of ferrets, public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers, children have taken to using semaphore in light of the recent mobile phone ban, and the government is cracking down on subversive groups. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. NaughtyFerrets's national animal is the ferret, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its currency is the raisin."

I'm experiencing a dilemma! The region of Ferrets has contacting me asking me to move from Caledonia, where all my friends are, to Ferrets, where several of the ferret nations are gathering. They trade in things like "pellets" and "shiny jingles." Oh, and though their flags are way cool, MINE would be the coolest by far! Oh the awful temptation!!

My Favorite Far Side

I found this while studying Aristotle in Nat Sci at my beloved alma mater - Shimer College:




Picture taken by current (2007) Shimer-in-Oxford student of
Aristotle Lane marker.

19.4.07

I Want To See Chris Kattan and Christopher Walken on Dancing With the Stars!



An oldie but a goodie! I will never tire of this video.

More Respect for the Colts

This aired on SNL on Saturday, March 24, 2007. I'm just gonna sit back and let it speak for itself....

Vote Like You're Chicagoans, People! Vote often!

And make up e-mail accounts to vote from!

Few things get me more keyed-up than being able to vote for the FIRST EVER STAR WARS STAMP at USPS.com! WOOHOO!

I have 6 email accounts (one for when a site "asks" me to register to view it, one for EBay/PayPal, two for personal e-mails as I make the switch from Yahoo to gmail, one that I set up when I couldn't choose between two names for my new gmail account, and, um....Oh yeah! One for work!) and I've cast my vote from EACH ONE, EVERY DAY SINCE TUESDAY OF LAST WEEK for Boba Fett! And he's not even in the top three. Help me out!


By the way, the winner will be announced on May 25th. And there's this number "41" printed on the stamp....WTF??? 41 cents already?? I'm still using my 2-cent stamps from the last rate increase!

6.4.07

Cough Safely, People!


Mu forwarded this link to me several months back. It's an educational video which instructs how to cough and sneeze properly. Thanks to Oto Rhino Lounsburgology Productions for such a valuable resource. If we follow their example, those circulating office germies will be dramatically reduced while our sleeves, especially at the inner elbow, will get a little crusty, thereby boosting the drycleaning industry.


Oh! Did I mention it's hilarious?

5.4.07

For ButterNugget

Yesterday I posted a comment on Peepster's blog where I referred to the album Under Wraps expecting nobody would know what the hell I was talking about. (Not a new experience for me, BTW.)

ButterNugget knew! *wipes away a tear!*

In my darker days as a child I'd imagine he'd suffocate.

Under Wraps, Shaun Cassidy's third album, was my favorite album from the time it was released in 1978 until I discovered Michael Jackson in 1982. It sported such hits as....um...okay, it didn't sport any hits, his first (self titled) album was the one that sported his hits, like, um....OH! "Da Doo Ron Ron Ron!", but when he sang "It's Like Heaven" off of Under Wraps I knew envisioned him singing to me while we wandered through a sunlit flowery field, plotting new and clever ways to terrorize my little brother without my parents ever suspecting I was in any way involved because he'd totally take the Wrap because he was so totally awesome. What a guy! *SWOOOON!*


Totally Swoonworthy to an 8-year-old!
But he never responded to my letters.
WHY?? WHY DIDN'T YOU EVER TAKE ME UP ON THAT DINNER OF MAC AND CHEESE AND OREOS??
I WOULD HAVE MADE IT MYSELF!!


If I'd been in on the Infamous Naming of the Flying Buttresses fiasco, I might have suggested naming our troupe The Shaun Cassidy FanClub. Thankfully, it would have been taken off the table pretty early on seeing as there is already an improv troupe by this name in OsWEEEEEEEgo, NY.

They're not really fans though. Under history they write:

1958 - Shaun Cassidy is born on September 27th in Los Angeles, CA. David Cassidy is pissed.

phhhsssshhhh!YEAH! Like, how could David have been pissed? He wasn't even BORN yet! Was he pissed in baby-to-be-born LIMBO??? Shaun's the oldest of the three, morons! Maybe you should change your names to "Shaun Cassidy's Fan Club Is A Really Cool Name For An Improv Troupe And We're Taking It Even Though We Really Don't Know The First Thing About Him Except That He Has A Brother Named David."


"..but not later than David because I'm the OLDEST!"

4.4.07

Add Your Own Captions!

I can't remember what the devil these two were talking about in these pictures. Can you help me out?




I Have NO IDEA What This Is, But I Want One!

Maybe I could find out what it is by reading Jennifer Ouellette's new book?

It looks like the Switzerlandians 'sploded a part of one of these thingambobs, so FermiLab will bring it on over here! *crosses fingers!* I'll go over there and stare at it for HOURS.....*sighs dreamily....*





(For the original story, click here.)

The Rev Only Loves Snow....

...when it grants him gloating rights!

Shannon bet Rev that it would NOT snow in April, but today, after a stretch of some wicked-good weather, we had a bout of flurries! Are natural forces at work? Or did the ticket takers at Too Much Light Makes the Baby Go Blind see into the Rev's very SOUL when they assigned him his name?

Y'Know, Maybe if Keith Richards Had Admitted He Did This In His Teens....

...Okay it would still be disturbing and gross, but his dad only passed away 5 years ago, which makes it all the MORE disturbing that he admitted having snorted his father's ashes with some coke.

Eew.
I'm sorry, which one was dead again? I can't tell from this picture...

Name the Kitty!

This cat needs a name! The winning bidder on EBay will not only get to name this kitty (he's about 3-4 months old now), but will have the satisfaction of knowing 100% of your bid is going to the Animal Outreach Humane Society of McHenry County.