6.9.07

Constitution, Shmonstitution!

That's right! I've decided Shrubbie can go ahead and choose the bits and pieces of the constitution he wants to, trample our civil liberties with wiretaps, torture people in Guantanamo - heck, keep Guantanamo open! as long as he shreds the bit of the law that states that presidents can serve no more than two terms in office. At this point, I can be pretty certain Shrubbie won't be re-elected - he's at, like, a 12% approval rate. I wish I knew who that 12% was - they should have to wear color-coded crystals in their palms. Not red, though! That'd be an insult to republicans.

Clinton, that's BILL Clinton, 2008!

Now, I'll admit it - I wish Bill Clinton could have been in office from 1992 until now, and then remain there for another 2 terms. I really liked and like Bill. I don't mind Hillary, I think she's brilliant, but she doesn't have his charisma.

I had this epiphany of letting Shrubbie change bits of the constitution only after the elimination of the 2-term limit after receiving two e-mails from Hillary Clinton's campaign. The first was dated September 4: "Let's do lunch."

"Let's do lunch. Let's talk, you and me -- about whatever you'd like. Our hopes. Our goals. Our work. The weather. Maybe even politics.

"I think it would be fun to have you over for lunch, at my table, in my home in Washington. You and I both know that we need a serious change of direction in this country. So let's sit down for a meal and talk about exactly the best way to make that change a reality.

Of course, that change can't happen if we don't win. So I'm asking you today to demonstrate your commitment to real change by supporting my campaign with a contribution. We're going to choose one supporter to come to my house in DC, along with a guest, to share lunch and talk. And if you contribute between now and midnight Friday, September 7, it could be you..."

This e-mail goes on for another 8 or so paragraphs, with "CLICK HERE FOR A CONTRIBUTION" highlighted 6 TIMES throughout. It was pretty easy to think "Wow! Way to play on America's love of giving when there's a chance they'll get something in return!" (How many times have you heard someone say they "won!" something on E-Bay?) I don't mean that in a totally cynical way - I really think it was a brilliant move. But, even though "every little bit helps," I won't be writing Hillary a check. I'm far more likely to give my money to NPR, Planned Parenthood, my coworker who's short and forgot his lunch, Kiva....there are about 6 organizations who need what money I can donate, not to mention Starbucks and Apple...

But I digress.

So anyway, then I got THIS e-mail today:

"Mind if I drop in?"

"Dear Jolene,


I hear you might be having lunch with Hillary -- do you mind if I drop in?"

This e-mail was from BILL Clinton! The wording from there on was almost the same as the first one, complete with four places to "Click here to contribute." But it was from BILL! Lunch with Hillary, yeah yeah yeah, but BILL! Now THAT would be a fun lunch hour! Hillary went from brilliant to BILL!!!-iant in two days.

I'll admit, I STILL didn't make a donation, but I was sorely tempted to "win" this time.

8 comments:

Shannon said...

Heeeey, I'm not sure I trust Bill "dropping in" with my hot wife...

OrangeMoJoJo said...

If he pulls out the Binaca breath spray, I'll make a graceful exit through the bathroom window.

Matt Stratton said...

Marge: Are you sure it's a federal law that I have to dance with you?
Bill Clinton: You know I'd change that law if I could Marge… but, I can't!

OrangeMoJoJo said...

"I may not have been the greatest president, but I've had the most fun eight years." –Bill Clinton

Matt Stratton said...

Bill Clinton: No, thank you, Lisa. For teaching kids everywhere a valuable lesson: If things don't go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Marge: That's a pretty lousy lesson.
Bill Clinton: Hey, I'm a pretty lousy president.

OrangeMoJoJo said...

"Poor Darrell Hammond. What's he going to do when I leave office?" - Bill Clinton

OrangeMoJoJo said...

"The 22nd Amendment should probably be modified to say 'two consecutive terms' instead of 'two terms for a lifetime.'" -Bill Clinton

NONONONO!!!! You've got it all WRONG! It should be modified to say "2 lifetime terms."

ultraorange said...

Bill was the best ... compared to Reagone, Bush 41 and his bastard sun.

Hillary isn't that bad. Maybe the US could use a Lady with some Thatcher qualities?