The Fourth Annual "Scare the Bejeebus Outta OrangeMoJoJo Contest"

"I have, indeed, no abhorrence of danger, except in its absolute effect - in terror."
-Edgar Allen Poe

HELL-OOOOOOOO-ooooooooooo??? I know it's been a while. Are you still there?

I'm sorry it's been so long. I've been a little tied up lately.

I'm really sorry to have left you hanging,

but you know I couldn't stay silent for long -

Add ImageESPECIALLY now that it's so close to Halloween!

I considered punishing all who doubted my return, but I chose to be merciful in making an example of only one of you. Don't make me come at you through your computer screen again, Rev.

Pic of Rev after I attacked him through his computer screen while he was typing in snarky comments about my "cobwebby blog."

I know this is getting more and more difficult every year, because few of you share my love of horror,

the macabre,

the wonderfully weird;

that delicious feeling of ice in your gut that bleeds to your bone marrow,

and turns your legs to stone.

This year I've come up with an extra-special treat for the winner of my little contest. Considering the length of my list (see bottom, erm, nearly the whole bottom half of this post, really), it's seriously amazing I get any response at all.

Well-written horror is thin on the ground, and I've read a lot of it.

A lot, but not all.

If there's a book out there or a story that I've missed, please let me know. Halloween is only a couple of weeks away and it's on a SATURDAY! Which means I'll get to stay up late. Really really late.

Hopefully scared ****less because of a book YOU recommended!

It's my thang.

If you send me the scariest title, I will send you a treat. And the book does not have to be classic horror. I mean, I love a well-written vampire-zombie chiller, but if you found a true crime story, a mystery/thriller - even a book by a Bronte (Wuthering Heights was a good suggestion, Mu!) - to be unnerving, that totally counts.

The last three winners were:

House of Leaves - Mark Danielewski (Hemlighet Forfattaren)
In Cold Blood - Truman Capote (Kelly)
The Exorcist - William Peter Blatty (Papa Schu)

Suggestions thus far:

Something Wicked This Way Comes - Ray Bradbury (Eevam)
The Owl Killers - Karen Maitland (Momster)
Brave New World - Adolf Huxley (Mere)
The Housing Boom and Bust - Thomas Sowell (DRoll)
Harvest Home - Thomas Tryon (Uncle George)
The Hot Zone - Robert Preston (Liz)
The Witching Hour - Anne Rice (Beth)
Sineater - Elizabeth Massey (Nepi)
Haunted - Chuck Palahniuk (Paul I)
The Vampire Lestat - Anne Rice (Aunt Sandy)
Carrion Comfort - Dan Simmons (Shannon)
Blindness - Jose Saramego (Evan)
Dracula, The Undead - Dacre Stoker and Ian Holt (Werewolf Boy)

OrangeMoJoJo's List of Banned ('cuz I've read 'em) Books:

Anything by Laurell Hamilton
Anything by Thomas Harris
Anything by Nathanial Hawthorne
Anything by Stephen King
Anything by Dean Koontz
Anything by HP Lovecraft
Anything by Robert McCammon
Anything by Edgar Allen Poe
Anything by Anne Rice

American Gods - Neil Gaiman
The Amityville Horror
by Jay Anson
Battle Royale - Koushun Takami
Blood Meridian - Cormac McCarthy
"The Casting of the Runes" - MR James
The Castle of Otranto - Horace Walpole
The Company of Liars - Karen Maitland
"Dr. Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde" - Robert Louis Stevenson
Dracula - Bram Stroker
The Exorcist - William Peter Blatty
The Family - Ed Sanders
Frankenstein - Mary Shelley
Ghost Story - Peter Straub
Good Omens - Neil Gaiman
The Graveyard Book - Neil Gaiman
Helter Skelter - Vincent Bugliosi and Curt Gentry
House of Leaves - Mark Danielewski
The House on Haunted Hill - Shirley Jackson
In Cold Blood - Truman Capote
Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
The Keep - Paul Wilson
The Last Coin - James P. Blaylock
"Miriam" - Truman Capote
The Monk - Matthew Lewis
"The Monkey's Paw" by W.W. Jacobs
The Moonstone - Wilke Collins
Necroscope - Brian Lumley
The Omen by David Seltzer
The Other - Thomas Tryon
Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier
The Road - Cormac McCarthy
Rosemary's Baby by Ira Levin
The Ruins by Scott Smith
Seven Gothic Tales by Isak Dineson
Shadowland by Peter Straub
The Song of Kali - Dan Simmons
Swan Song - Robert McCammon
The Terror - Dan Simmons
The Trial - Franz Kafka
The Turn of the Screw - Henry James
Twilight - - Stephanie Meyer
Vathek - William Beckford
Weiland - Charles Brockden Brown
The Woman in White - Wilke Collins
World War Z - Max Brooks
Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte


evandebacle said...

I found Blindness by Jose Saramago to be horrifying. Also, The DaVinci Code, but for wholly different reasons.

Rev Transit said...

Terrific post, Jo. Your best post of the month, I'd say.

Try to make the scars symmetrical.

Anonymous said...

The book I mentioned is at this link:

Werewolf Boy

Anonymous said...

Here's the link to the other book I mentioned:

Werewolf Boy

OrangeMoJoJo said...

Excellent! You get to choose one - do you have a preference? Stoker's great grandson's book has received about a 3 star rating through Amazon so far, and Memoirs has 5 stars, if that helps...?

Mu said...

Never read them, but there are two rip-offs out there:

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Mr. Darcy, Vampire

They are probably more funny than scary.

OrangeMoJoJo said...

There's also Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters.
Mr Darsy, Vampire got the highest Amazon reader rating so I'll try that one.

This has been an excellelnt batch of suggestions. Thank you all!

Shannon came across a site I'll be referring to from now on. A few of the short stories have been featured on Pseudopod, and they've been quite good, so I'm excited to see what else has been up for the Bram Stoker award. I haven't even heard of many of these authors/titles!